Inspired by Perfection

Our women's Relief Society class at church was about patience. One sweet sister made the comment that it is sometimes hard to be patient with yourself when you can see others around you who seem to be so much further ahead and more successful with everything in life than you are.

"Don't worry," the kind teacher assured her, "they just look perfect on the outside. They have just as many faults and troubles as you! You know that sister that everyone talks about: the one who bakes her own bread, makes her children's clothes, always has her house tidy, does her scripture reading every day? She doesn't exist!!" And many in the class laughed a little and seemed to feel better.

Detail from Pioneer Women, by Julie Rogers. © Julie Rogers.  

I remember my wonderful mother-in-law, who was a stake Relief Society president for many years, telling me, back when I was a young mother, about a women's meeting her stake had recently enjoyed. One of her counsellors had spoken about 'this mythical Mormon woman', who seems Perfect in every way. "And do you know what?!" the speaker assured the congregation of mormon women, "she doesn't exist! And if she did exist, she wouldn't inspire me! I'm inspired by You! By your faults! Because I can't relate to that 'perfect woman'! I can relate to you!" My faithful mother-in-law told me how much the talk had meant to all the women there, and how much they had loved it.

"I don't think we need to be threatened by perfection," I ventured to comment to the teacher on Sunday. "I think there is so much to learn from each other, and I am very grateful to have examples around me of people who can do so many things better than I do."

"Yes, but if anyone seems to be too perfect, it's just discouraging!"

And I thought - what then of the wonderful gift of our Saviour's perfect example? Do we feel badly about ourselves because He was without fault?

Isn't one of the greatest blessings we have here on earth, not only the perfect teachings, but also the perfect example of our Saviour?  We are able to take great strength, not only from the teachings of our prophets and apostles, but also in great measure from the example of their lives too - as with the lives of so many other good and great people, both the humble and the feted, that we are so blessed to have around us, or to know something of.

My grandmother's example, for instance, taught me that you really could have a beautiful, perfectly clean, perfectly well-ordered home, and that such a home could provide a strong base for a peaceful family life. I wouldn't have learned that so well if I hadn't benefited from her near-perfect example as a home-maker. Other examples I have garnered from friends, leaders, family members, and outstanding biographies, have taught me that I can be more loving, more hard-working, more patient, more forgiving, more generous, more brave and valiant, more humble and meek, more studious, more spiritually attuned than what I currently am - and these wonderful examples have shown me that perfection, and certainly great improvement, is veritably attainable in all these areas.

I don't find inspiration in under-achievement. How can I, since I'm already there? If I am to perfect myself, I don't think it will be from looking to people's faults, but will be by having kind hands, loving faces, and fine examples before me, to help raise me up. Before and above all others, we have the example of the Saviour to guide and help us in all things. 

Perfection in others is surely the very opposite of discouraging!  If someone else can do it - I think it's likely that you and I can too. Are we not all children of our loving Heavenly Parents? We are all sent here with the same divine potential, and with the same sure promise of celestial success, if we do our very best to follow the Saviour's example.

I cannot think of a single person I know who I don't look to for an example in some thing, or that I can't learn from. I'm constantly amazed and delighted at how truly wonderful people are. It's a big part of my testimony that we are in reality, all children of God - because I see divinity in God's children all around me.

I also believe that a lot of the things that we think of as being faults in ourselves and others, are probably somewhat insignificant in the big scheme of eternal everything. And that a lot of the kindnesses, and courage shown by many, every day, are actually more significant than we currently understand - in much the same way that the stumbles of a toddler learning to walk are really just moments along the way to his knowing how to run - important as part of the process, but eventually all but forgotten in the glow of his eventual, sure success - if he keeps trying, that is.

I'm grateful for your good examples. In uncountable ways, you are more creative, more sociable, more diligent, more insightful, more progressed, more all sorts of wonderful things than I am, and I am so grateful that you are!

So - please don't hide your perfections under any kind of bushel! Your shining lights are helping me to find my way forward and upward too :)

By Sandy Munro