Having been born in the country to hard-working parents I knew nothing of the way I was supposed to manage finances. I was educated at a little one teacher school and had finished schooling before I was fifteen years old. I had learned to work hard and long on my parent’s rural properties but that work was all for our family. The only money I had ever held in my hand was on very rare occasions when we went to town and Mum or Dad would give me a penny or threepence (three pennies) to buy an ice cream. I never had any money to my name.
I had left my country home for the big smoke when I was nearly sixteen. In the country town where I went to work my parents had arranged for me to live in a boarding house. I soon learned when I got my first pay I had to pay board. I had always been taught that nobody owed me a living and I had to pay my own way so it was easy to pay my board out of my first pay. It was very strange to me for many months that I was getting paid to do work which I was enjoying. My only understanding of people being paid was when my Mum and Dad received money for the cream that was sent to the butter factory or when calves, pigs or other cattle were sold at sales. My only understanding was people were paid for the products they produced not for the time they worked. It took me a few months at the boarding house before I realised that I did not have to do the housework there.
I had no idea how to use money. If I had money I spent it. I had not learnt to value money and had not learned the principle of saving. As the years went on I think I gained a little insight into the idea of saving instead of spending but I did not know how to save. I had no idea that I had to budget. Right up to the time Merv and I were married I was completely useless at trying to save money. Merv was working in the railway from the time he was 14 ½ so he did not have any other trade or know any other work and he too had no idea on how to manage money.
Through observing some of my married friends before I was married I think I gained a little insight into how money or lack of money can cause disharmony in a marriage relationship. On a few occasions I had seen a friend ask her husband for some money to buy something and he would respond with something like, ‘now you owe me so many pounds’ or sometimes the picture was reversed. In those instances I could sense the friction that sometimes existed between this husband and wife. We did not want that in our future so before we married we said whatever money came into our home it will be not be ‘his’ or ‘hers’ it will be ‘ours’.
Up to our wedding day I had lived at the Nurse’s quarters at the hospital where I worked and Merv had lived in a boarding house. Merv had used nearly all the money he owned to pay a fortnight’s rent in advance on the place where we would live after we were married. (The place Merv rented for us was a bedroom in a three bedroomed home. We moved in there the night we were married. We shared the home with the wheelchair bound double amputee lady owner and an older couple (that in itself is another story) who occupied the bedroom across the hallway from ours. We shared the use of the kitchen, bathroom, laundry and toilet. The toilet was way down in the back yard surrounded by lots of trees and that was scary when one had to go there at night.) We had very little cash between us and I had £2/11/2 (probably the equivalent of $5) in the bank. The little cash we had took care of us for the week Merv had off work. Eighteen days after our marriage I withdrew the money from the bank and that provided us with most of life’s necessities until Merv’s next pay. So began the journey of living from pay to pay.
As time went on in the two or so years very little changed for us financially. The lack of savings did not cause problems between us but it did cause problems inasmuch we would get very concerned and sometimes despondent about our financial situation. Many times Merv would lie awake at night wondering how on earth we were going to manage.
I was twenty-two years old married with two small children and I was still completely hopeless at managing Merv’s hard-earned meagre income. The only consolation I ever felt in this was that all my friends were in the same boat. We lived from pay to pay. Neither of us had any idea how to manage the money. We got money and we spent it. We sometimes ran out of money before the next pay but amazingly we never went hungry. We always paid the rent and fed ourselves but we could not save money. The small child endowment we received from the government helped us but we still could not save money. I still did not know how to save money.
When we entered the third year of our marriage and our little girls were aged eighteen months and three months respectively the missionaries called on us and we heeded the call of the prophets and became members of the church. From the moment we joined the church our lives changed. We had a different perspective about money. We had always known it was our responsibility to provide for ourselves but now we had learned the principle to be wise with our finances. At first paying tithing was a trial but we did it. We continually tried to be obedient to the principle of tithing. There were times however when we had to go without but there were times when the Lord knew our needs and we were blessed. We still did not know how to budget but we knew we had to take our tithing out of the pays before we used any other money. We did not become rich but we were living in a society where people cared and where the Lord was aware of us and we had many blessings come our way. We felt we would never be rich on the wage that came into our home. With our limited education our income was not as good as we would have liked or as good as we needed.
We did not own clothes that were fitting to wear to church. Sometimes we had no shoes and someone has given us some. Merv was without a suit and a missionary gave him a suit. He did not own a tie and a missionary gave him a tie.
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Baptism day
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We tried to be faithful in the Church but Merv’s shift work was not compatible with his Church calling. He resigned from his work in the railway to enable him to be better involved in the church. For three months we lived on what little money he received when he resigned. After applying for many jobs and not being successful in that period we were becoming desperate for work. The period of no income helped me learn ways of cutting down on my grocery shopping; I learned to use powdered milk instead of bottled milk; we learned to use margarine instead of the expensive butter and we contented ourselves with cheaper cuts of meat. I learned to make our own bread. I learned to buy in bulk which was much cheaper in those days. I tried to cut back whenever and wherever I could.
Eventually Merv acquired a job sweeping floors in an electrical goods spare parts and repair warehouse. We once again had an income. We tried harder to save money. We tried in our own way to budget. We did the jar thing when Merv would get his pay we put money aside for certain needs. The milk money and the bread money were always put into jars and always there when we needed it.
The man working behind the counter at Merv’s new place of employment went on holidays so Merv even though he had no knowledge of the products was asked to fill that position temporarily. Merv learnt a lot about electrical goods and spare parts. He retained that position behind the counter even after the man came back from his holidays. It was at this time when we had four little children that we tried desperately to budget our money. We were told the bank would take money out of the fortnightly pay. With learning that so began our embarrassing journey to budgeting. We spoke with the bank and we opened several bank accounts wherein a certain amount of money designated for specific purpose was deposited directly from Merv’s pay each fortnight. That started our involuntary saving and in spite of it being an embarrassment it proved worthwhile for the time.
One day when we had five children Merv had to do the financial report for the Branch of the Church. He had never done anything like that before and did not really understand how it had to be done. He was most worried about the responsibility. Merv showed me the book. He covered the names of people but with just one glance at the book I saw the columns and their headings. I exclaimed ‘Oh. Is that how they do it!?” It was a revelation to me. I immediately knew what I had to do. I had to close the bank accounts and keep a budget book. I embarrassingly went to the bank and closed the accounts.
I found budgeting so easy after seeing how it was done and then incorporating it in my life. Every fortnight for many years I dutifully balanced the budget. Every transaction was faithfully recorded.
Without the church and without us trying to be obedient to and living gospel principles who knows I may never have learnt the way to budget and the way to feel satisfied with our financial affairs. It was not a case of our income increasing it was a matter of being able to manage our income. Budgeting did not make us rich but I was in control. I achieved peace of mind. I also learned another principle. It was not how much money we had come into our home it was important that we put aside some savings. From following guidelines that I have been taught in the church I have found contentment in the way we have been able to utilise our income.
By Helen J Leneham
(Sisters, if you are struggling to manage your money, see here and here for helpful guidelines.)
